The Unpreventable
by beautifullife92
Summary: "Crazy. I wish that were true but no matter how much I try to deny it, some things are unpreventable" Anna Grimes has been deemed crazy, sent to a mental hospital due to her insisting that a dream is a warning of the end of the world but when all hell breaks loose, will they continue to question her insanity? Previously "Dreams That Shouldn't Come True". Eventual Daryl/OC.
1. The Christmas Warning

**Hey hey everybody! Welcome to the first official chapter of this story! I know this is a little late but it's important to the story. This story was a lot of fun to write. It takes place a few months before the apocalypse. The Bunny nickname is only temporary as it is apart of Anna's past unless you want it to stick. I also thought this would be a cool way to explain how the Dixon brothers came into the picture. All your favorite characters will be and it'll be about 2 more chapters until season 1 takes place. Not sure if there will be Daryl/OC pairing. I can say that they become good friends so it's possible but we will see later :) I hope you enjoy it! Please review and let me know! and before anybody flies off and leaves nasty comments, try leaving me a civil message first. I am more than happy to answer any and all questions and take in suggestions! Thanks a bunch!**

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I woke up gasping for air and trembling wildly in my sleep. I look around and discover that yes, indeed, I'm still living in this hellhole. I look across the room and see the flowered wallpaper peeling, on the other side the barred window, with one side cracked and of course, on the floor beneath the welcome mat, there's a huge hole covered by a stop sign and that's just my bedroom. Normally, I'd look at this place in disgust but I won't ever think of this place again. Not after the same damn dream I just had. In fact, I was beginning to savor every last minute I had left.

I suppose I should back up and explain myself. My name is Annaliese Grimes, Anna for short and on the outside, I may appear to be your typical twenty five year old but for more reasons than one, I'm not. I live in some rundown town about three hours away from Atlanta and it's definitely not a place you want to be seen in. If someone even asks you where you're from and it just happens to be here? Lie. Because you'll most likely be labeled as a whore, prostitute, druggie, drug dealer, pimp, thief, liar, cheater, gang member or hell, maybe even all of the above. It doesn't matter if you're not, maybe you're here because of the cheap rent. That's why I'm here…well, partially. I have my own past problems and labels but that's not me anymore. But there is one thing about me that makes me different than all the others.

You probably won't believe me when I say this but…I have dreams that tell the future. Sound like a bunch of bullshit? I wish! I wish it were true. I wish I was crazy. I wish that this was the result of all that shit I let myself get a hold of but actually, it's the complete opposite.

I've had these dreams ever since I could remember and the worst thing about them is one, they only seem to reveal the bad things and two, they ALWAYS come true. Why I was chosen for this cruel curse, I don't know. I have no frickin' clue but it's awful. It started when I was about eight years old when I had a dream that my cat died. I thought it was just a nightmare but about a month later, it happened. I was devastated but I thought it was just a coincidence. It happened more and more and it started to scare me. Not to mention, it tore my family and I apart. Mom and I, we had a few issues but I still loved and respected her. My dad and I were really close. I mean, as close as a father and daughter could be. I looked up to him. He was my role model and he was always there for me. I could talk to him about anything…except my dreams. When I was seventeen, I had a dream that my younger sister Emmy was hit by a car and killed. I didn't want to believe but I knew how my dream were and I tried desperately to stop it. That's when I told Dad about it and he looked at me like I was crazy. It turned into one of the biggest fights we'd ever gotten into. Then, when it actually happened, I was angry. At myself, at both my parents and everyone. I had another dream when I was eighteen that not only did I sink into a major depression but I fell into some other stuff that I shouldn't have.

Dad, he put up with for a while. He didn't kick me out at first but our relationship was wearing thin. After two calls about me being in a car accident due to drinking while driving, pulling me out of a few crack houses, he and Shane, his best friend, beating the shit out of a dirt bag boyfriend and a near death experience, Dad had finally had enough and so had I. I was scaring Mom and Carl, the only sibling I had left and Dad…he was beside himself. The fear and disappointment on his face was more than I could handle. So I left. No goodbyes either. Just a note. No number, no way of getting a hold of me. Cruel? Maybe but not as bad all the hell I put them through. I was full of regret but I couldn't bring myself to face him.

And you know the worst about it? I saw it all coming and no matter how much I wanted to stop it, there was no avoiding it.

So that's why I'm here. I've worked at the same bar for three years now. It's not the best job but it pays the bills and my coworkers aren't so bad. I had to work Christmas Eve but oh well, at least I'm home for Christmas Day, which really isn't a big deal considering I haven't been around family for three years. It would've been fine it weren't for the most absurd dream I have ever had.

I'm still trying to figure it out. It started out with me trying to warn people. Anybody and everybody. So called friends, neighbors, family, random people but nobody would listen. Then about a week later, a strange news story came on. People from all over were dying from this deadly virus but that wasn't the strange part. The strange and really scary part was that they were coming back to life and becoming these violent, cannibalistic creatures that I could only describe as zombies. Then all chaos broke lose. The military had fallen and was killing everyone. I had a glimpse of being on the main highway with Shane, my mom, Carl and a few other people I didn't know. There were explosions in Atlanta and the whole city went up in flames and then shortly after, those…creatures ran us out. Then I woke up.

"That's one hell of a Christmas present, man!" I yelled at the unknown cause of my nightmare.

I racked my brain trying to think this through. How? Why? Where? And most of all, when?

I close my eyes and try to think of any sign I was given as to when. Then I remember the news story. There was a date at the bottom. What was it? What was it?

April 12, 2010. 11:05 am.

My eyes snap open. That's it. That's the date. I run over to my calendar. That's only a little over two months away. And if that didn't shake me up, the next realization did. In my dream, Mom and Carl were there but my dad wasn't…

I sit back on my bed and pull my knees up to my chin. "No, no, no, no, no, no." I start to cry. "Please, please don't be true. Please let him be ok." Yet I couldn't shake the undeniable feeling that he wasn't or rather wouldn't be.

I wipe the tears furiously from my eyes and get dressed. I had to start warning people, starting with my coworkers. I know they won't but I have to get it off my conscious. There was one girl I knew there who would listen, the only person I really considered my friend in this town. Her name is Tammy but everyone calls her Taz due to her wild hair and personality. But she's a good person at heart. She knows about my dreams only because I had a dream that her boyfriend, who at the time she worshipped him, was going to beat the shit out of her and put her in the hospital. She didn't believe me when I tried to warn her, of course, no one listens to me. But when it happened…I told her the rest of my story and she actually began to believe me. I could only hope that she'd listen to me now. She also just happens to be my boss and I need to talk to her about me taking off a few days to see my family so that I could warn them.

I twist my long brown hair into a messy bun and put on jeans, a green sweater and my brown boots. I look into the cracked reflection staring back at me and see my father. I practically look like the female version of him. God, how I missed him. I hoped more than anything that we could somehow patch things up.

I grab my purse and keys and prepare myself for what's to come.

I am, however, not prepared to see a present on my doorstep when I open the door. I narrow my eyes and pick up the box wrapped in green and red paper with a bow on top. I shrug then tear off the paper and open the box lid. I scream and nearly jump out of my skin when I see a creature look and hiss at me. I quickly throw the box and out comes running a possum. A fucking possum! "Damn it, Dixon!" I screech, knowing exactly who pulled this prank.

I hear a deep laughter coming from the porch next door. "Shut up, Chester!" I yell at the elderly black man.

This only makes him laugh more. "Now I knows there was somethin' strange about ol' Dixon leaving you a gift. That man wouldn' give ya the shirt of his back fo' anybody much less leave a nice Christmas present." He chuckled.

I narrow my eyes. "Which one did it?" I demand.

He sobers up from his laughing fit and gives me a look. "Which one do ya think?" He retorts.

"Merle." I growl. Why did I even ask? Out of the two Dixon brothers, Merle was the worst and he was well known for messing with people. I snatch up the creature who was cuddled in a corner. "Shut up." I snap as it hisses and tries to bite me. I turn back to Chester. "Thank, Chester." I mumbled then I stomp over to my neighbors across the street.

"Ah hell, Bunny is hopping down the war path. Er'body clear out!" he cracks up, making me role my eyes at my nickname. I earned it though. Everyone who works at the bar has a nickname. For example, Taz earned hers because of her wild, crazy hair, she's fast around the bar and God forbid if you make her angry. Me? I earned mine on my first night working. I was really nervous and we had a huge crowd thanks to football night. I was doing fine until I dropped two big bottles of vodka on my foot. Long story short, I ended up with a bloodied foot and once I got that cleaned up, I was limping around on one foot but since no one could see that because of the bar being in the way, it looked like I was hopping around getting drinks. You know, like a fuckin' bunny. Merle, his brother Daryl, Chester, everybody in town was in the room and was laughing at me and Merle, the kind soul that he is, was the first one to call me Bunny and it stuck. Shitty night, right? And ever since then, if he or anyone else who was there that day, if they bring a new person they introduce me as Bunny. I gave up trying to correct people. Though I'd never admit it, the name grew on me. My dislike for Merle never went away though. Should've my reaction when I found out he was my neighbor but that's a whole other story.

I walked over and rammed my first rapidly against the door. "Dixon, get your ass out here!" I yell.

A moment later, Dixon opens the door but it's the wrong one. "Shit, what'd he do now, Bunny?" Daryl asks annoyed.

I held up animal squirming around in my hand. "Your dumbass brother left me one hell of Christmas on my door step!" I explain angrily.

Daryl sighs then shakes his head. "Be right back." He says then goes back inside. I stare at the creature in my hands. Nastiest thing I've ever seen in my life. Daryl comes back and rubs his neck. "He's sleepin'."

I give him a look then soften my face. "Ah, that's too bad. Excuse me." I say as I push past him and see Merle passed out on the couch. I suddenly get an idea then look from Merle, to the possum to Daryl. Then I reach over and grab the shotgun in the corner.

Daryl raises his eyebrows as he shakes his head then lifts up his hands defensively. "Stayin' outta this one."

"Good choice." I say mischievously.

I take the possum, who finally calmed down and put it gently on top of Merle's chest. I look at Daryl, who's hiding a smirk then gently shake Merle. "Merle, wake up." I say in a soft sing song voice.

His eyes flutter open and he looks at me with a confused expression. "Bunny? Whatcha doin' here?"

"Oh ya know, being neighborly but I'm afraid I return your gift. It's not really my favorite pet but he likes you." I say sweetly then point to the animal who's sniffing around.

He looks down and then suddenly jumps up and screams. "Shit! Shit!" He screams over and over. The possum hops onto the back of the couch and starts hissing. Merle practically leaps across the room. I aim the shotgun at the animal then pull the trigger, sending a bullet straight through its head.

Merle shoots me an angry and confused look. "What the hell were you thinkin'?!" he screams at me.

I laugh hysterically then bow with the shotgun in hand. "Merry frickin' Christmas from Bunny, Dixon!" I say happily then drop the gun and prance out the door, laughing hysterically all the way to my car.

When I get in, Merle is standing in his doorway. "That's not the right way to return a Christmas gift, Bunny."

I put on a fake frown. "Thanks for the laugh, Dixon. I'll bring you some cockroach cookies later!" I say sarcastically as I drive off. I felt quite accomplished. I hope he does it again next year.

As I arrive at the bar, my smile fades as I remember why I'm there. The place is dead and I'm hoping Taz will be reasonable. Please listen to me, I say to myself.

I walk in the door and Taz turns around and greets me with a smile. "Hey, Bunny! Merry Christmas! Take a seat." She motions towards the bar stool.

I smile at her and sit down. She comes over and hands me a glass of thick yellow liquid with two brown sticks in it. I give her a look. She knows I gave up drinking a long time ago. "What? It's just eggnog." She says innocently.

I raise my eyebrows at her. "You mean _spiked_ eggnog?" I ask accusingly.

Taz looks down guiltily. "Maybe." She answers sheepishly and I give her smirk. Her face break down into a smile. "C'mon, Bunny, it's Christmas! Humor me, it's my Christmas gift to you." I sigh and she looks at me hopefully. "It's got cinnamon in it." she says sweetly.

I finally give up and laugh. I didn't want to disappoint her so I took a sip and to my surprise it was really good. "You're ridiculous." I say after I satisfy her.

She grins then says, "So how's your day going?"

I tell her how Merle's Christmas prank back fired on him and the story sends her into hysterics. She's laughing so hard that tears are coming out of her eyes "I can't believe you did that! You're lucky he didn't kill you!" she laughs.

I shrug as I take another sip of my eggnog. "I regret nothing." I say mischievously which sends us into another giggling fit.

She finally sobers up from her laughing then her expression turns serious. "So what are you doing here? No offense but it's Christmas and I highly doubt you came here for the eggnog and a funny story." I look down. "What's up?" I hear her ask.

I sigh and I play with a string on my sweater. "I had a dream last night." I say nervously.

Taz face falls as she leans against the counter. "What happened?" she asks knowingly.

"Something terrible. I don't want to believe it." I say quietly.

"What is it, Bunny? Is it your dad or something?" she asks concerned.

I shake my head. "No but I wish it were more simple like that." I whisper.

She frowns. "What happened?"

I look around and make sure no one is listening. "War." I say carefully.

Tazs' eyes widen. "War? When? Where?"

"Here. Next year."

Taz freezes and thinks about my words. I take a deep breath and continue. "It's not an ordinary war either. It's…." I trail off, suddenly afraid.

"It's what, Bun? Tell me." she says gently as she taps my arm.

I look her in the eye. "It's the apocalypse."

You could hear a pin drop in the room.

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**Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think! :D**


	2. Been There, Done That

**Hey everyone! HAPPY NEW YEARS! Thanks for the favs/follows! I appreciate it! Hopefully this story is off to a good start. Little note here, I'm not sure if there will be Daryl/OC pairing later on but I will say that will become good friends and this chapter shows how that started. If you think they should be together, let me know. Action parts coming up soon! :)**

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The look on Taz's face said it all. She didn't believe me nor did she want to. I told her my whole dream, leaving no detail out. The funny thing is, she believed the war part at first but when I told her about the zombie apocalypse…that was just too much for her to handle. She thought I was joking at first but my face showed no sign of any humor, she just stared at me with her mouth slightly open.

"I know it's hard to believe-"

"Yeah, it's hard to believe!" Taz scoff's then crosses her arms. "You expect me to believe that 'zombies' are actually real?"

I give her a look and shrug. "They're going to be." I sigh then take out my notebook and show her the sketches. "This is what I saw." Then I pointed to a city that on one page had burst into flames and on the other, was overrun with the creatures.

"That's Atlanta." She points out as she stares at the page.

I nod then turn to another page of a hospital then flip through a few other pages of major cities, towns, and places that I saw in my dream, all of which were surrounded by these creatures. "Major cities, towns, hospitals, prisons, supermarkets, even places you'd think would be safe, all of them overrun. Hardly anywhere is safe." I explain.

Taz glances at me with doubtful eyes. "So what exactly caused this outbreak?"

I flip to another page at the beginning and show her a sketch of the news report. On the TV there's a headline that explains it all. "It starts out as a deadly virus outbreak. Folks start getting the symptoms of the common flue but then they get worse and it becomes more deadly than the h1n1 or any of those deadly virus's combined. It kills people pretty quick but here's the catch and this where it gets really weird and scary." I pause and make sure she's paying attention. "They come back to life."

That's more than enough for Taz as she slams her arm down on the counter. "Bunny, I don't know what shit you're on but you need to get straightened out. This is bullshit." She says bluntly.

"Taz, hang in there with me, please. Please listen to me." I beg. "I know it sounds crazy and I don't know the scientific reasons behind this but it doesn't stop there. These creatures that the sick evolve into, they're dangerous. They attack people and if you get scratched or bitten, you get infected and the same thing happens to you. The sickness, it burns you out then you die then you come back then you become one of them and it's a vicious, crazy cycle that can't be stopped."

I sound crazier and crazier the more I talk but I can't stop. I know what I saw and I know that this will happen. Taz, she's just about done with me and my stories. She doesn't believe a word I'm saying. "Say all this is true…what do you want me to do?" she asks skeptically.

I shrug. "Stay away from major cities, especially Atlanta. Stock up on food. Make sure you know how to use a weapon-"

Taz holds her hands up. "Bunny, listen to yourself!" her voice rises. "You're talking about a crazy nightmare that you had and you're taking it seriously. Don't!"

I scoff. "You didn't think I was crazy after your boyfriend beat the shit out of you." Silence. "Taz, you know me. You know I'm not lying when I say these things. Why would I? Why would I make this up?" I'm on the verge of tears now. "Do you think I want to be right about this? Hell no. But I can't change it. I've had it three different times, it will happen."

Taz remains silent until she finally shakes her head. "You sound like a crazy end of the world preacher." She whispers honestly.

I smirk. "I feel like one." I grab her hand. "I hope more than anything that I am wrong. You don't know what it's like being able to see these things and not being able to do anything to prevent it. I've tried. But I really hope that this is an exception. I mean, maybe you're right. Maybe it is just a bad dream but I'd rather be safe than sorry. I would rather warn people now and be wrong later than ignore it and it actually happen and not being prepared. Better safe than sorry, right?"

Taz sighs. "I guess." She says doubtfully. "You're not gonna let this go, are you?"

I give a faint smile and shake my head. "And you're not going to believe me, are you?"

Taz looks at me sheepishly and I sigh. "Well, I saw that coming too." I say quietly.

"Bun-"

I hold up my hand and interrupt her. "It's ok. But do this one thing for me. Stock up food. Read a book on survival. Get a gun, go target shooting." She begins to speak and I cut her off again. "Humor me, Taz. Just do it. Please. Safe than sorry, ok?"

She stares at me and then finally shakes her head. "How long?"

"April 12th, next year." I answer.

"So soon." She says sarcastically then sighs again. "Alright, I'll humor you. I'll do everything you say but if you're wrong, you and I are going to have one hell of a drinking party."

I laugh. "I'll poor the drinks myself."

"Deal." She shakes my hand with a chuckle then turns serious again. "Something tells me this isn't the only reason you're here. Go ahead, spill it."

"I have to talk to my dad." I say, getting straight to the point. "I need to fix things before it's too late to be able to fix anything and no, this isn't about my dream. He's a police officer, you know. Anything could happen and I don't want anything to leave those skeletons in the closet anymore. It's time to face what I did. I left without saying anything. Hell, I could be dead and no one would ever know. Likewise with them. I can't do that anymore. It's time for me to go home."

Taz smiles. "Well, all I can say is that it's about time." She began. "Don't matter if this is about your dream or not. Family is family. Been tellin' your ass for years to go back."

I return her smile. This is a subject that Taz knows very well. She herself left and while she was gone, her mother died in a bad car accident. She's been telling me ever since I got here that I needed to go back and reconcile with my family. We'd even gotten into a few fights over it. While I understood where she was coming from, my regret held me back. "Well, now I'm doing it." I say to her.

"What changed your mind?" she asks curiously.

I shrug. "I've been holding myself in contempt for years. It's why I left and it's why I'm going back. I…can't handle it anymore. This shame, grief, self-hatred…it's more monkeys on my back than I can handle." I look down at my hands. "Dad doesn't need that anymore either. Neither do Mom or Carl. They're still my family. I can't write em' off like that."

Taz nods in agreement. "You're doing the right thing. Really, you are." She puts a hand on my shoulder. "You deserve better than all this, Bunny. I've been telling you that for a while but I mean it. This town, this lifestyle, hell, this job. It ain't for you. You have a family who loves you. Go back to them, tell them how sorry you are and how much you love them. You're still young. It's not too late to make things right."

I smile and nod. "Thanks, Taz. I'm not moving right away but I want to make a trip to see them, set up a meeting and see if we can work things out." I say.

"Name a date and you can have it." She replies happily.

I chuckle. "I have to call a friend first, arrange the meeting. He'll know what to do and what date is best."

"Ok. I suggest you get on that soon. If you procrastinate, I'll kick your ass." She winks.

"Thanks, I can always count on you." I laugh sarcastically. "I'll let you know as soon as I get a hold of him, figure things out."

Taz nods then changes the subject. "So, what are your plans tonight?"

I roll my eyes. "Lock the doors and keep all the crazies out."

Taz laughs. "Same ol' same ol'. Well, you know the drill. If you get bored and need a good time, call me. Maybe I can see you up with a man." She winks seductively.

"Ha, right as if I don't have enough to worry about. The hell if I need another man. No thanks." I scoff as I take a sip of my eggnog.

"I don't know, you and Dixon could hook up." she wiggles her eyebrows and I choke on my drink, making her laugh.

"No thanks, I don't want anything he has to offer. Besides, I don't think Merle is my biggest fan after today." I say as I wipe my mouth.

"I'm not talking about Merle," I give her a suspicious look and she smiles.

"Who then? Daryl?" I say incredulously and she cracks up. "Jeez." I shake my head.

"Hey, out of all the bozos around there he's the only one with his head half way screwed on." She laughs.

I mock her laugh. "That maybe so but I still think I'll pass. That man has a temper on him."

"Maybe that could change if he had a lady his life." She says with a smile.

I roll my eyes. "Daryl is someone who desperately needs a hug but if ya try, he'll stab ya in the back." I mumble.

Taz cracks up. "Got that right. Can't blame him though, given his family history." She says seriously.

"Yeah, I feel sorry for him. He seems like he could be a pretty good guy if weren't under Merle's influence." I agree. "But I've been under that control and it's not easy to get out of. Hell, it took my old man dragging me out of the house to convince me." Flashbacks haunt my mind and I try to shake them away.

Taz offers a sympathetic smile. "The point is you made through, hun. Hopefully Daryl will have the same epiphany." She says.

"Maybe." I whisper then finish the rest of my eggnog. "I guess I'll get going." I say as I stand up and grab my keys.

She nods then gives me a hug. "You take it easy, ya hear?" she whispers.

I nod and give her a reassuring smile. "I'll see you tomorrow." I say cheerfully then I wave to her as I leave.

Once I get home, I flop on my bed, suddenly tired. Before my eyes close, I say aloud. "I'm going to take a nap now. Leave my dreams the hell alone." I might sound crazy but I'm very serious and I really just want to a peaceful nap.

Surprisingly, I fall into a dreamless sleep and don't wake up until I'm jolted out of my sleep by screaming and cursing across the street. "The hell?' I mumble as I walk over to my window. "Ugh, not again."

Across the street, I see the two Dixon brothers and a black gang outside going at it. I roll my eyes and shake my head. Never a dull moment. Probably something to do with Merle not getting his money or the other way around. I wait around to see if I need to call the cops, it wouldn't be the first time. At first, it's Merle and the leader of the gang yelling at each other but then suddenly a fight breaks out and they're all beating each other. I cover my mouth as Daryl takes most of the hits and Merle does nothing about it as he continues yelling at the men. He's just making everything worse. I'm about to go down there myself when I see Daryl on his knees and a man is pointing a gun at his head. Finally, Merle settles down, and the rest of the people back off. Eventually they settle something and the gang leaves. But what really irks me is that Merle didn't help Daryl up, not even offered him a hand. No, even from here I heard the insults and Daryl said not one word. He hung his head down low and took it, like he always does. And as much as I don't usually care for the Dixon brothers, a ton of emotions flooded me. Anger, sadness, understanding. It was like looking in a mirror but worse. Nobody deserved this. It was like looking at a puppet on a string. That's why, when Merle finally went inside and left Daryl on the street, I took it upon myself to grab my first aid kit and head down stairs.

Call me brave or stupid, but I am definitely not heartless. Nobody should have to go through this, especially on Christmas.

I walked out the door and saw Daryl still on his knees, thinking hard about something. I stand in front of him and offer my hand. He looks up me skeptically. "It's alright, it's just a hand."

He continues to stare at me. "What do you want?"

"To help you." I answer.

He scoffs then shakes his head. "I don't need your help." He says quietly.

I put my hand down. "Really? Then get up by yourself." I challenge.

He glares at me then tries his best to get up and he does but not without wincing and grunting in pain. I try to grab his arm but he yanks it away and limps up to his door. He tries twisting the knob but it's locked. "Damn it." he curses under his breath.

I cross my arms and look at him. "What?" he snaps as he tries to steady himself against the wall.

"Let me help-"

"I said, I don't need your help!" He yells defensively but he sucks in suddenly and doubles over.

I hurry over to him and wrap his arm around my shoulders. "Yeah, you got this all figured out." I say sarcastically. He tenses at my touch but he's in too much pain to say anything else. "C'mon, at least let me get you cleaned up. Then you can be on your way. Think you can suck up your pride for that long?"

"Screw you." he mumbles but doesn't fight against me as I drag him to my apartment.

"Yeah, that's what I thought." I say as I roll my eyes.

Once inside, I guide him over to the couch and gently set him down. I grab my first aid kit and begin cleaning the scrapes on his face. His eyes never meet my own and I understand why. In his family, this is considered weakness. I walk over to the refrigerator and grab an ice pack. As I get it ready, I notice the blood seeping through his shirt on his left side. "Take off your shirt." I instruct him.

He raises his eyebrows at me. "I ain't doin' any one night stands." He says sarcastically.

"You're not really in a position to say no." I retort and get a good laugh out of his face. "Besides, as lovely as that sounds, I need to look at those cuts on your side."

I walk over with the icepack in hand and sit down on a stool in front of him. I start to help him with his shirt but he jerks away. "I can do it myself, Ma." He says childishly.

I roll my eyes and wait patiently as he carefully takes off his shirt. What I see makes me want to cry. Scars, numerous ones, new and old, litter his front and back. "You gonna get to work or not?" he snaps slightly as he catches me staring. I blush then turn my attention to the huge gash on his side. I do my best cleaning out and bandaging the wounds and I do so in silence.

"You have a pretty bad gash on your side but it doesn't need stitches. It should heal fine on it's own. Other than that, it's just a bunch of bruises so you're probably going to be sore for a few days. Let me get you another ice pack for your other side." I mumble as I stand up quickly and make another ice pack. It's quiet but I feel his eyes on me.

"What's the matter? Don't like what ya see?" he asks but his voice holds no malice. I know he's staring at me though.

I pause but avoid his gaze and his question. "This is going to sting." I whisper as I go to place the ice pack on his ribs but he grabs my hand firmly. I don't dare look up. I'm frozen in my place and I realize my hands are trembling.

"Look at me." he demands and I slowly look up. His eyes are fierce but they hypnotize me. "I don't need your pity."

I snap out of my reverie and shake my head. "It's not pity, it's understanding." I answer and he scoffs.

I ignore him and continue cleaning his wounds, even if they're small scratches. Finally, I break the silence. "When I was eighteen years old, I was convinced that I'd never marry or hook with a guy who'd mistreat me. I'd always heard about it, ya know. Even saw a few people in that situation." I sigh. "And then I met him. He was two years older than me, charming and handsome as always. I was stuck in a horrible depression and for a while, he dug me out, lifted my spirits. Daddy never liked him. From day one he disapproved but I was mad at him so I refused to leave him. I had a lot of pain and he had all the answers or so I thought at the time. I eventually moved in with him and that's when the shit hit the fan. He introduced me to the needle, you know, all the "good" stuff. Anything that would take away the pain. Hell, I didn't know where I was half the time. We went from place to place. He got me into some major trouble, especially with my family. It took a huge toll on my old man. He's a cop and he had to drag me out of a few places. He stood by my side in the hospital and cried on my shoulder. He begged me not to go back but I did…every single time."

My hands are still now and I talk more to myself than to the man in front of me. "The last time I was in the hospital, I scared my family so bad that it actually got my attention. I told my "boyfriend" that we had to stop and he agreed…for a while. As soon as we got home, he started his shit again. I told him he needed help, that we could get through this. His response was a fist in my face. Then he shoved the needle into my arm. Long story short, it just got worse from there. He'd beat me without any reason at all. Called me weak when I didn't get up or choked on a drink. Made me feel worthless, pathetic, stupid, and so small. I was ashamed of myself and I wanted help but was too afraid to ask. Finally, one night, he beat me so bad that I could barely breathe. I was literally choking on my own blood. I still don't know how I did it but I managed to get a hold of the phone and call my dad. I left him a voice message and I remember crying and telling him that I loved him. I didn't think he'd come but not even fifteen minutes later he showed up with his partner and beat the living shit out of him."

"Sounds like you lucked out." Daryl whispers emotionlessly.

I shrug. "You could say that. Probably the only reason I'm here but in the end, it didn't matter. Because even after they locked him up, he still had a way of hurting me. His words were imprinted into my head and I couldn't live with it. My dad's face…I saw it every time I closed my eyes and I couldn't stand it. I knew I put my family through hell. Two years, I put them through that shit and it ate me alive. So I left. I thought I was doing the right thing but it's only now that I'll freely admit that he was the reason I left and the reason I haven't talked to my family in three years. After all this time, he still had level of control over me. Every decision I made, I thought of him and what he would say." I cautiously look up at Daryl, who's staring at me intensely. "I'm screwed up, Daryl. I always have been and probably always will be. I deal with stuff that no one should have to. Sometimes, I even feel cursed. But eventually, you just have to get up again and tell all those flaws, regrets and memories to move the hell over and get back behind you."

"What's your point?" Daryl finally says in a pained voice.

"I told you. I don't 'pity' you. I 'understand' you. Even though our situations aren't exactly alike, it's the same concept."

Daryl looks away. "You don't know a damn thing about me."

"I know enough-"

"You don't know a damn thing!" he repeats angrily.

"Then why are you here and why are you listening? Why didn't you say 'fuck off' in the middle of the street, huh?"

"I said 'screw you' but you still dragged my ass here." he grumbles. "Why don't you mind your own business?"

I scoff. "I've heard that line many times before from my own mouth and I'd be dead if anyone listened to me." I return his glare. "You're a puppet on a string, Daryl and your family, your brother, they're controlling you.

Daryl stands up and gets in my face. "You best shut the hell up. I didn't ask for your therapy or your advice so you can take it and shove it. You don't know shit about my family!"

"Then why did you sit there and listen, Daryl?" I say firmly and stand my ground. "When I saw that gang beating you and your sorry ass brother sat back and watched then turned around and hurled more insults at you, I was staring at my own reflection. I've been there!"

He gets closer. "I ain't nothing like you! You had no business butting in. Just because you been through the same thing don't mean a thing. I ain't your problem." I stare at him and shake my head. "What are you gonna do? What, are you gonna cry? You gonna try to get me to 'see you the light'?" He asks mockingly.

"No," I disagree in a small voice. "because you're right. I don't know you. I guess I can't really understand either. I can relate but that's it. I'm not gonna say the same things that drove me crazy. However, I want you to know that I don't think I can fix you and I'm not gonna try because that's something you gotta work out yourself." I place the ice pack in Daryl's hand then step around him and begin to walk up the stairs and turn around. "You're welcome to stay here tonight. I don't think Merle is gonna open up any time soon. There's a blanket on the back of the couch, food in the refrigerator, bathroom is on the right, feel free to use the shower. If there's anything you need, just holler."

"You barely know me and you're letting a stranger crash on your couch?" he asks skeptically. "That's a good way to get yourself killed."

"Go ahead, I got nothing to lose. Loot the house, trash it, hell, take advantage of me while you're at it." I say nonchalantly.

He raises eyebrows then shakes his head. "People talk if word gets out. Call you crazy for being with a Dixon."

I laugh. "Do I look like I give a shit about what anybody says about me? C'mon, Daryl. You know me better than that. Besides, it wouldn't be the first time I've been called crazy." I smirk. "Hell, people might think you're crazy for being here but you know the reason why you're here. Your asshole of a brother locked you out, you needed a place to crash, and Bunny just happened to be up and in a good mood."

"Why are you doing this?" he asks.

"I'm being neighborly." I reply sarcastically.

Daryl snorts, earning a laugh from me. "What about you? Do you give a shit about what people think?" I ask him.

"Hell no." he says without any hesitation.

"Alright then, make yourself comfortable." I chuckle yet he still looks apprehensive. "Or you can leave. Either way I don't care." I shrug.

He stands there, looking at me. "Yes?" I ask and he shrugs and looks down.

"Just tryin' to figure you out is all." He answers quietly.

"Good luck. I'm still trying to figure myself out." I say with a faint smile.

He nods then sits on the couch and gives me a questioning look. I give him a reassuring smile then continue up the stairs. "Hey, Anna." I freeze in my spot and turn around. Daryl searches for the right words but finally sighs and says, "You're alright."

I look at him with a confused expression. "What?"

"I said you're alright." He says and I shake my head.

"Not that." I say slowly. "You called me Anna."

Daryl shrugs. "That's your name, ain't it?" he asks.

I remain silent for a moment then finally nod. "Y-yeah." I stutter.

He holds my gaze for a moment then nods. "Sounds a hell of a lot better than Bunny." He jokes lightly.

I offer a faint smile. "Yeah, yeah it is." I whisper in agreement.

"Night." He says then lays down, covers himself off and puts the ice pack on his head.

"Night." I say quietly then continue my way upstairs.

As I lay in bed, I think about my conversation with Daryl. Besides Taz, I had barely talked to anybody about my past much less in that much detail. I tried mulling it over in my head, trying to figure out why and the only reason I could come up with was remembering what someone told me. It was a nurse and I had shut down and wouldn't talk to anybody. She told me that when I started talking openly about my past that is when I'd know I was healing. Is that what that is? Maybe. It hurt a bit but it wasn't so bad. Maybe it was Daryl was a good listener too. I hoped that at least some of what I said stuck with him. I hoped that before the world ended, he'd get his life together and be able to live a better life. He wasn't a bad person, I decided. He's just stuck in a cruel mess.

I chuckle at the irony as I remember Taz and I's conversation earlier. Turns out I really did end up spending Christmas with Daryl Dixon. I'll admit, despite everything, it wasn't that bad.

I sighed, knowing there was still something left for me to do, even though it was kinda late. I knew he'd be up. I heave myself out of bed and start digging through some old papers in a draw until I finally find a sheet of paper with numbers on it. I close my eyes as memories wash over me. It's over, I remind myself. It's time for a fresh start.

I could've called my dad first but I decided against it. I wanted to talk to someone who's been in our family for years and knew my father inside and out. Someone who would honestly tell me how he and everyone else were doing.

My hands trembled as I punched in the numbers and waited for the person on the other line to pick up. Finally, a familiar gruff voice answered. "Hello?"

"S-shane?" my voice stutters.

"Who is this?" He asks skeptically.

I take a deep, shaky breath. "It's Anna." I say calmly.

* * *

**There ya go! Hope you like it so far :) P.S. The Daryl needing a hug quote was actually from Norman Reedus and I always found it hilarious so I wanted to find a way to put it in there hehe ;)**


	3. Too Much Fun

A big _thunk! Is heard on the other side. "Shane?" _I call out over the phone.__

There's a bit of rustling over the phone but he finally picks it up. "Anna? Are you there?" he says in a rush.

"Yeah, I'm here." I answer.

He sighs in relief. "Anna, where you been? Your family has been worried sick. Are you alright?" He asks hurriedly.

"I'm fine, Shane, I promise. I'm about three hours away from Atlanta." I assure him.__

"Why you callin' so late? Are you sure you're ok?"

"Shane, I'm fine, I promise I am. I'm actually really good. And I'm clean, finally. I have been for about three years now." I try to calm him down.

"Well, that's all good and everything but you left without any notice. No note, no number, no address, nothing. We been looking around all over for ya. Rick, he's searched all over the place." He sighs and asks in a less heated voice. "What do you have to say for yourself, girl?"

I roll my eyes, feeling very much like a child in trouble. "I had to get away, Shane. I had to. It was the only way-"

"So you just take off?" he ask angrily.

"I did what I had to do!" My voice rises. "You have no idea what I was dealing with. I had to leave. That place was killing me and it was killing Dad and you know it. The last time he-" I stop myself and take a deep breath. "I couldn't do that to him anymore, Shane. I was sick, depressed and every corner there was temptation and a damn reminder everywhere I went! You don't know the amount of shit that I was dealing with so don't you dare try to make me feel bad! I know I was wrong but I had to get away. I had to get better. Believe me, it killed me moving but I had to do what was best for me and I couldn't have anyone interfering with that." I try to calm down but it doesn't any good. Maybe this wasn't a good idea…

"Alright, alright, let's just both calm down and take a step back." Shane huffs. "I'm sorry, I jumped the gun. It's just…we've been worried about you. All of us, me included. We assumed the worst."

My shoulders slump. "Dad?"

"First year, he was out of it. Took off work for a while then came back and worked so much that he barely saw Lori or Carl. He wasn't himself for a long time but he finally came around. Holidays don't get any better..." he trails off. "especially Christmas." He finishes sadly.

I close my and rub my forehead. "I know. It's been just as hard on me as it has them." I whisper.

"Yeah, I bet it has." His tone changes into a friendlier one. "How you been? What you been doing these past three years?"

"Staying out of trouble." I laugh nervously. "Been a bartender and living in a hole in the wall but it's not so bad. I get by and the most important thing, I'm clean, sober. Hell, I might even be happy again." I smile to myself.

"That's real good, Anna. I'm proud of ya. Really I am. Well, besides the bartender part." He chuckles. "But I have a feeling you didn't call me to fill me in on you been. What's going on?" he asks.

I remain silent for a moment but then I somehow find the courage to explain myself. "I need to talk to Dad. Mom and Carl, too but mostly Dad. There's a lot of things that need to be talked and worked out."

"Yeah, you know he misses you, right? He ain't mad at ya." He says quietly.

"I know. That's the thing about Dad. Out of all the times I showed my ass, he never yelled or stayed mad at me. He always pulled me out of whatever mess I was in." I sigh as a dull ache throbs in my heart. "And the worst part is that he never turned me away. He just gave me this extremely sad and disappointed look."

"Anna, don't beat yourself up. Your daddy loves you. He always has and he always will. Nothing will ever change that." Shane says meaningfully.

I smile to myself. "I sure hope so. And then there's Mom…" I trail off.

My mother and I have never really seen eye to eye since the day my little sister. I blamed her because she was inside making coffee instead of watching her six year old daughter. I was furious and hurt when I came home and found out. Even though Dad tried talking to me about it, that one of the few things we never saw eye to eye on. After it happened, I drifted away from her and Carl. I guess, in a good way, it wasn't such a bad thing in the end. She and Carl grew closer after that. I guess you finally realized how fragile life is. I've tried to forgive her, I really have and I hope that when I go home, we can start over.

Shane sighs. "Anna, you have to let that go. I know it hurts and it was a tragic accident but it was just that, an accident. You know, she don't show it much but it really does hurt her. She wanted to have a better relationship with you."

"I want to have a better relationship with everyone when I get back, Shane. Being away so long has made me realize how much I love and miss them." Tears prick at my eyes. "I just hope we're not broken beyond repair."

"No," he says adamantly. "You may have been an ass and fell off the wagon but it ain't too late. Your family loves you too much for that. So do I. You had me worried sick, girl. But it's only because I care 'bout ya."

"I know," my voice cracks. "Long story short, I want to come home."

"So what's stopping ya?"

I pause and look nervously down at my hands. "It's been so long…I don't want to just open the door and be like 'hey! I'm home!' I want to do this wisely which is why I called you. I wanted to see if you had any ideas. If I can have it my way, I want to meet with Dad first. I just don't know where or when."

"I see." He thinks for a moment then gets an idea. "Remember that garden you love so much? Rick visits it every Saturday around noon. Sometimes I go with him and have lunch. Is that too short of a notice for you to come?"

I look at the calendar. "No, I'm off tomorrow…are you sure that's going to be ok for you?"

"Positive. We already talked about it. He's meeting me at twelve, why don't you come a little early? Like fifteen minutes early?" he suggests.

I take a shaky breath. Don't you dare back down, I warn myself. "Tomorrow is as good a day then any." I finally get out. "I'll be there." I say hesitantly.

"Sounds like a plan then. I'll be there to meet ya, get a hug in before the sappy reunion takes place." he jokes.

"Good idea." I laugh. I don't deny because I know it's true. When it came to Dad and I, we were both crybabies.

"I'm proud of you, Anna. I know this is hard for you but I give you credit for facing your fears. It'll all work out. I promise." He encourages.

Damn tears. "Thank you, Shane. For everything. You were always there with Dad when he had to come rescue me from trouble and even more when I left. "Thank you" can never repay you for that but it's the only words I can think of."

"We were partners long before police work and we'll remain partners for a very long time. He's been there for me more times than I could ever count. It's the least I could do for him. More than anything I'm glad you're ok and I'm anxious to see how this is going to play out." He replies.

"You and me both." I laugh nervously.

"Don't stress yourself out over it. Get some sleep so you'll be safe on the road tomorrow." He advises.

"Ok. See you tomorrow." I say a final goodbye.

He repeats my words then hangs up. I let out a huge breath I'd held in and let the tears feel freely. I throw the phone on the floor and pull my knees up to my chin, rocking myself back and forth. I can't stop crying and soon it turns into sobs. All the fear, frustration, anger and pain that I've avoided for so long comes back and hits me in waves. I know I'm doing the right thing but I can't help but remember the death warning that awaits us all. I don't want to die like that. It's terrifying knowing the future and knowing that nothing good is going to come out of it.

I finally give up and crawl underneath the covers, sniffling and shaking until I fall asleep.

_Images and visions flash before my eyes. They go through quickly and don't really make sense._

A camp overrun by those things, the Walkers I heard somebody call them. People running and being attacked, the whole camp in a panic. A woman bent over a young girl screaming for her to wake up.

Hiding behind a truck while a building exploded.

Running after a girl who was being chased by Walkers.

About three seconds each were these glimpses and they just got more terrifying by the moment but there was one particular that cut me so deep even in the middle of this nightmare.

My father lay lifeless in a hospital bed and I saw myself crying on his shoulder as I begged him to wake up. Shane was suddenly behind me and was doing his best to comfort me while he was vigorously wiping away his tears. Suddenly screams and chaos on the other side of the door get louder and louder followed by gunshots. Shane keeps telling me that we have to go but I can't bring myself to leave my dad. He tries to check for a heart beat but can't hear one which sends me hysterics while Shane begs him to get up. Then he stops, listens then shoves me to the ground right before someone bursts in. Shane keeps his hand around my mouth until the intruder leaves then when it's all over, he gives me that look that I've seen a thousand times and I know I have to say goodbye. I'm sobbing as I lean down, grab my best friend's hand and kiss him on the forehead. Shane wraps an arm around me, pulls me into a quick hug, says a quick goodbye to my dad then leads us into the unknown.

I wake up in such a panic that I fall off the bed and hit my head on the corner of my nightstand. "Ow, shit!" I curse loudly as I feel my forehead and my hand comes back red. "Damn it!" I curse again as my head begins to pound. I try to stand up but my head spins. I close my eyes and will the spinning to go away and when I open my eyes I see the face of Daryl standing in the doorway with a concerned face.

"The hell what happen to you?" he asks in his usual redneck manner.

"I whacked my head on the table just for the fun of it." I reply sarcastically.

Daryl snorts. "One way to do it." he smirks then walks over and offers a hand.

I look at him skeptically but grab his hand. As he pulls me up, I become dizzy again and almost fall over. He catches me then sits me on the bed. He moves my hair to reveal the nasty gash and winces. "Damn, havin' way too much fun." He says.

I roll my eyes. "Story of my life." I mumble, earning a faint smile.

Daryl then stands up and walks away without a word. After a few moments pass, he finally returns with the first aid kit and a wet wash cloth. He gives me a look. "I ain't a doctor but I know a thing or two about cleanin' cuts. Might as well return a favor." He says then starts preparing the bandages. I remain silent as I watch him closely and flinch involuntarily when he reaches up to my cut.

He gives me a questioning look but I shrug and look away. "Force of habit." I explain quietly and he nods then starts cleaning the wound.

I remain still and quiet until he's done putting a bandage and takes a step back. To my amusement, he hands me a hand held mirror and lets me see his handy work. "Not bad." I compliment.

"So what happened? I heard screaming that woke me up then a bang." He asks curiously.

I sigh. "Bad dream."

He raises his eyebrows. "Must've been one hell of a bad dream." He says.

I nod. "It was." I look down at my hands. "Even in my sleep I can't escape my past."

I feel Daryl's eyes on me. "I understand." he says and I look up. "I get em' too." He says with intense eyes.

We stare at each other for a few moments then, without any other words, he walks out of the room and once again leaves me alone with my curiosity. __


	4. Reunions

When I woke up, my head throbbed where I'd hit it last night and I let out a groan. "Damn it." I cursed as I closed my eyes to try to help ease the throbbing. I laid there like that for a few minutes until my body adjusted to being awake then slowly sat up. I rubbed then looked over to my nightstand and saw two pills along with a note and a glass of water. I picked up the note and laughed.

"_Chill out on the fun next time."_

I didn't have to question who that was from. For some reason it amused me to no end. I should be embarrassed but I really wasn't. I barely knew Daryl Dixon but in the past twenty four hours I had taken him in, clean him up, shared my deepest darkest secrets from my past, then I whacked my head, he played doctor, and shared sarcastic comments and notes. He was the last person I ever thought I'd do any of these things with but I'm not afraid to admit he wasn't so bad. In fact, I actually enjoyed his company. Maybe when the shit hits the fan we'll help keep each other sane. Never hurts to find a friend for the end of the world.

I shook my head then swallowed the pills and water. I looked at the clock and saw that I had about an hour before I was supposed to leave to meet Shane and Dad. The thought sent chills up my spine as I remember my dream and suddenly my good morning was ruined. But as quickly as it came, I pushed it away, refusing to believe that this can't be prevented. I had to save him. Some way. Some how.

I took my time picking out and putting on a pair of jeans, red sweater and black boots. I braided my hair to the side and then started digging through my jewelry box. I found my favorite necklace that I hadn't worn in forever. It was a simple silver heart shaped locket but inside is where the memories were held. I clicked it open and on one side staring back at me was a picture of me and Dad. I was fifteen when we took that picture. Mom was taking pictures at a picnic and I had snuck up on Dad and threw my arms around his neck. I caught him by complete surprise and he fell forward. We got back up, my arms still around his neck and we were laughing hysterically. We looked up just in time for Mom to this picture. It's one of my all-time favorites.

The other picture, it makes me both happy and sad. I had just turned sixteen and at school there was a father daughter dance. I had no idea that we were going because he said he had to work that night. I was disappointed, really disappointed because I had been looking forward to it for so long. I had even picked out the perfect dress and showed it to Mom. It broke my heart when he said he couldn't go but I put on a brave face and said that I understood. The day of the dance, when I got home from school I went up to my room and when I opened the door, I saw my dress and shoes laid out neatly on the bed. I gasped and when I turned around, Mom was beaming and held out her cell phone.

_"I'll pick you up at six." The familiar voice said._

"Daddy? You…you're coming?" I asked in a teary voice.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world, baby." He replied and I could hear the smile in his voice.

I remember how excited I was. Mom spent two hours getting me ready. From helping me with my dress to curling my hair and pinning the beautiful silver butterfly clip at the back of my head. The dress was perfect. It was a simple blue strapless dress along with matching silver sandals. Simple but my style. When I came down the stairs, my younger sister Emmy complimented me with a bright smile and said that she wanted to wear the same dress when she was my age to the same dance. I smiled warmly at her and promised to keep it in my closest in mint condition for her. I waited anxiously for Dad to come home. When he finally walked through the door, he was already dressed in a tuxedo with a blue tie matching my dress and his hair nicely done. When he met her eyes he beamed at me and opened up his arms which I immediately threw himself into. I remember being so happy that we finally had time together. Between him working so much and sharing him with Mom and my other siblings, we had barely had any time alone and I treasured the time we did have, especially that night. We had so much fun and were able to catch up on each other's lives.

I smile down at the locket. The picture was taken by my best friend Elaine who had snuck in with her Dad's fancy camera and snapped a picture of us during a slow song. Dad was holding me to his chest and we were both had our eyes closed and were smiling. The lighting was just right with the white lights sparkling in the background. She took quite a few, insisting that she just couldn't resist. This one was my favorite though. Not just because of her photography skills but because I remember he had just given me this heartfelt father daughter talk. It had made me so happy and even now I'm wiping away the tears.

The sad thing about it was that he gave me this locket for my seventeenth birthday and I fallen in love with it but two days later was when I had the dream about Emmy dying. Though this locket brings back good memories, I can't help but think about Emmy. How my dress stayed in the closet and collected dust. How she never got to do the father daughter dance and hear Dad's speech. She died too young and even today this locket brings back pain.

However, I shake the memories from my head and clasp it around my neck, finding it better to be thankful for the time that I had for my sister instead of being bitter about it. If anything, I should be thankful she won't have to face this new world coming up. Knowing that lifted the weight off of my shoulders. This was a big day. Was I ready for it? No but I was used to dealing with things that I wasn't ready to face.

I look at the clock and see that I have thirty minutes to spare so I choose to call Taz and fill her in on everything. She gets excited when she hears about my reunion with my father. She thinks I'm doing the right thing and says she'd fill my shoes for tomorrow as well if I needed it. We talk about that for a few minutes and then, just to amuse her, I tell her about my night with Daryl. She seems pretty shocked but then asks all the details and even gets on to me a bit.

"Bunny, you know Merle is going to give you shit for this, right?" she scolds.

My face heats up. "Let him!" I snap. "He can kiss my ass and so can anybody else. Nobody deserves to be treated that way, especially Daryl. You know he's actually a pretty decent guy but nobody can see that because they don't bother to reach out to him."

"Nobody has been brave enough." she points out. "Look, I'm not saying it's a bad thing. Even if anything it shows your true character. Sounds like you're a lot like your Pops."

I tense at the comparison but realize that's not such a bad thing. I sigh. "I just can't stand seeing people being treated like that. You weren't there, Taz. Merle let those men beat the shit out of Daryl and I have a feeling it's not the first time. I knew he was an asshole but I have a new level of dislike for Merle. I can't stand people like that. They destroy people like Daryl and I hate it."

"I understand, hun." Taz sympathized. "You did the right thing. Something most people wouldn't even think about it. Who knows, you may even find a diamond underneath all that hard coal."

"I hope he'll give me the chance to look." I mumble.

"Who knows, maybe you'll even find something else." I can cxpractically see Taz wiggle her eyebrows.

I roll my eyes. "You're a real piece of work, you know that?" I reply, earning a laugh from her.

"You never know." She insists with a chuckle.

"Yeah ok." I reply sarcastically.

Shortly after teasing each other back and forth, we finally get off the phone and I realize it's time for me to go.

I sigh as I take a final look in the mirror then grab my keys and head downstairs. I look to the couch and find it empty with the blanket folded nicely on the pillow. Daryl must have left pretty early, I assumed. Well, at least he was nice enough to fold everything and take care of me last night. It really was a nice gesture that I never expected from him. Maybe it was his way of saying thank you. Daryl seemed like one of those actions speaks louder than words people.

As I step outside and lock the door, I'm jolted from my thoughts as I hear the last person I want to hear from get my attention. "Hey hey, Bunny." I cringe at Merle's voice. "Have a fun night with my lil' bro last night?"

I turn around to see Merle standing in his doorway with a smirk on face. I roll my eyes at him. "Don't start, Merle." I warn.

He laughs. "Bought time you two get laid. Though by judgin' by your pissy mood it must've not been that good." he teases.

I feel my cheeks get hot. "Maybe I'm in a pissy mood because of assholes like you keep pissing me off!" I snap then stomp over to my car.

"Aw, don't be like that, Bunny." He mocks in a fake sympathetic voice. "Tonight I'll show you how a real man gets the job done." He wiggles his eyebrows.

I nearly throw up. "I'm not interested in having what all your other hoes have nor am I interested in low life's like you." I retort.

"Then why'd I find my brother come from your house last night?"

"Because you drug him into the middle of your drug dealin' fights and he got the shit beat out of him while you watched! Then you have the nerve to kick while he's down and lock him out of the damn house." I shake my head angrily. "Yeah, you're a real man alright and one hell of loyal big brother. I can see family means so much to you." I say with as much sarcasm as I can muster.

He takes a few steps closer and points a finger at me. "You shut your mouth, young lady or I'll shut it for you." he threatens.

"Go ahead, Merle. Take your best shot." I challenge. "I know people like you and you're not even worth the gum on my shoe." I say heatedly and dare to take a step closer.

We go back and forth and eventually end up yelling at each other and getting in each other's faces. I don't know what came over me but I just couldn't stand back any longer. Between the unrighteousness of my past and seeing what Daryl goes through every day, it just pushed me over the line and just when I thought we were both gonna lose it, I hear Daryl's voice telling us to knock it off and suddenly he's standing in between us.

We both pause, Daryl looking back and forth between Merle and I. "The hell is goin' on here?" he asks.

"Nothin' lil' bro, just havin' some fun with Bunny here, next thing I know she has the nerve to question my loyalty towards ya. Steppin' way too outta line for a woman. I'ma bout' to put her back on the rabbit trail." He threatens, all the while keeping his eyes on me.

"Oh, I'd like to see you try." I challenge again with a laugh as I take a step forward.

Daryl plants himself firmly in between us. "Enough." He says.

"Don't think I won't? Alright." Merle tries to push past Daryl and I stand firmly in my place.

"Bunny, get outta here!" Daryl hisses as he tries to keep his brother from coming at me.

"No," I say stubbornly. "Let him go."

Daryl looks at me as if I'm insane and in that split second Merle pushes past him and storms over to me. I wait until he's close enough before I whip out my pistol that my father given me. Merle comes to a sudden stop and looks at me in surprise. "Go ahead," I urge. "Put me in my place."

Merle's face suddenly breaks out into a grin. "Well, well, ain't you full of surprises. Go ahead, show me whatcha got." He mocks me.

Without hesitation I shoot a beer can that had been laying on their doorstep. I hit it right in the center. It's slightly comical how they both turn around and look at me at the same time. "My father's a cop." I explain. "And after I got the shit beat out of me by another scumbag like you, he taught me how to shoot and defend myself. I won't make the same mistake twice."

He stares at me for a moment then smirks and holds his hands up in surrender. "Well, ya got me Officer Bunny." He mocks sarcastically then takes one step closer. "Why don't ya take me to jail?" He wiggles eyebrows again.

In response, I shoot the ground half an inch next to his foot, making him jump back and curse. "How's that for an answer?"

Once again Daryl steps in between us. "I said, 'enough!' Now knock it off!" He says with more authority.

Both me and Merle are surprised by the sudden outburst. "Well, Darlina actually put on her big girl panties today." Merle laughs then shakes his head. "You know what, you two ain't even worth it. A worthless bitch and shell of a man, no thank ya. I got better things to do." he says then turns to leave.

"Yeah like all the whores down town." I mumble and Daryl shoots me a warning look and I shrug. He didn't hear me.

When Merle is inside, Daryl turns to me. "The hell do you think you were doin'? You wanna get yourself killed?" He asks angrily.

I narrow my eyes and show him my gun. "Do I look scared?"

He shakes his head. "You don't get it, do ya? That move wasn't brave, it was stupid!" he says bluntly.

"I wasn't trying to be brave, Daryl. I just refuse to tolerate being walked over like you do!" I retort but then immediately regret my words. Daryl's eyes widen then grow angry as he purses his lips. "God, Daryl, I didn't mean-"

"Stay the hell away from me." He interrupts then storms off.

"Daryl, I'm sorry!" I apologize as I go after him. "That was a really bitchy thing to say."

"Damn right." He mumbles as he keeps his back turned to me.

It stung a bit but I shrugged it off. I stumble over my words then finally just give up and sigh. "I'm sorry I said it that way, you didn't deserve that. It's just…it gets me so angry when I see people treated that way! I-I hate it. It gets me so riled up because I've been there. I've been treated that way and it's wrong!" I walk around him to face him and he just stares at me with a defensive look. "You're not a bad man, Daryl. You're not weak. You're not a shell of a man. You're not anything he says you are. Don't believe it."

He stares at me for a moment then finally looks away. "You don't know shit about me and I damn sure don't need your pity. Leave us the hell alone." He warns then walks away from me.

I shake my head and sigh. "Dad was right. Watching people go through this does suck." I say sadly as tears prick my eyes. I stomp back over to my car and slam the door as I get in. I huff frustrated then smack my steering wheel. "Damn it!" I yell as tears start flowing down my face.

After I take a moment to calm down, I wipe the tears from my face and crank the vehicle. As I get ready to pull away, I see Daryl standing at his doorway staring at me with a curious expression. I shake my head and before I start crying again, I drive off in a hurry.

Three hours in a car by yourself gives you plenty of time to think and reflect on your life. I often wonder, how is my life going to end? Was it worth living and did I fulfill my purpose if everything ended tomorrow? I heard once that the battles we go through are going to help others in the future. I wanted so bad to believe that. To somehow justify all the hell I put myself through. I had wanted to bring something good out of it. I wanted to help someone get through it. Now I can't help but think of myself as a failure. I wanted so badly to help Daryl, mostly because he was a mirror of myself. Stuck and heart hardened. It sucked. The thing is, for a brief moment I saw that look in his eyes. Desperation, want but hopelessness as well. It haunted me because if there's one thing I've learned, you have to want to be free. Otherwise, there's no hope.

As I near the city limits, I shake the thoughts from my head and pay attention to the road and the task at hand. Soon enough, I'm turning onto the road that leads down to the rose garden and my heart is practically in my throat. My hands are trembling on the steering wheel and I can feel the sweat on my brow. I look at the clock as I make the turn and see that I'm right on time. 11:45. And much to my surprise, so is Shane. I know that beat up truck from anywhere. As I park, I close my eyes and take a deep breath. This is it. Time to move forward.

At the gazebo, I see Shane sitting on the railing with his back turned towards me. I sneak up quietly and stop a few feet away from him. "Howdy, stranger." I smile as I use my old greeting.

He whips around in surprise and then breaks out into a relieved grin. "I'll be damned," he says as he hops off the railing and walks towards me and holds out his arms. "What are ya waitin' for, girl? Give your old man Shane a hug!" he exclaims excitedly.

I laugh and then throw my arms around his neck. He holds me tight for a moment and whispers in my ear, "Welcome home."

I close my eyes and squeeze him back. "It's good to be home." I whisper back meaningfully.

Shane lets go then smiles again at me. "I know I sounded a bit angry at ya on the phone but just know it's because I care about you and your family." He sighs and looks at my sheepishly. "You don't know how much this is going to mean to him, Anna. He had stopped mentioning you for a while but these past few days he's been talking nonstop boughtcha. You and Emmy. Retelling stories about Christmas mornings and all. Nothin' you can do about Emmy but you…you came back and I can tell ya right now, you best be ready to get the breath squeezed out of ya."

I chuckle softly and nervously tuck a strand behind my ear. "I'm ready for it. In fact, I can barely stand to wait any longer." I look down at my hands. "It's been too long. I'm sorry, Shane. I know I hurt you too. I hurt a lot of people."

I feel a hand squeeze my shoulder and I cautiously look up. "All is forgiven. The fact is that you're here now. You're making things right. It's nothing a few words and a few hugs and tears can't clear up. You're family love ya. More than anything they're going to be relieved you're alright." He says encouragingly.

Tears fall down my cheek and my throat tightens so I just nod. "Hey," he says softly as he takes me into his arms. "Everything is gonna be alright." I cry into his shoulder as I begin to tremble again. I'm so terrified I can't even stand it. I wish Dad would get here already. I'm ready for this to be done.

Before long, I hear a familiar vehicle drive up and I look to see my dad as the driver. I begin to hyperventilate and I wanna run but Shane gives me a stern look. "It's gonna be alright, Anna. Wait here."

I nod then shakily take a seat at the picnic table as I watch Shane run down the step over to the truck where my father is. They greet each other with a manly hug and pat on the back and then Shane wastes no time in talking to him. The sight of my father makes my heart race. He looks the same but older, more worn out and tired looking. I can't help but feel guilty.

When I see him put a hand over his mouth and gives Shane a heartbreaking look, Shane looks over at me and motions for me to come over. I shakily stand up from the table and take cautious steps towards them. When I get closer, Dad sees me and his eyes widen. I stop in my place and shakily whisper in a low voice, "Hey, Daddy."

I see the tears flood his eyes as the recognition sets in and he lets out a sob as he tears away from his place and heads towards me. Legs trembling, I make them move so I can close in the space. We practically crash into each other as he wraps his arms around me tightly and pulls me to his chest. All the emotion hits me at once and I pretty much collapse in his arms as a loud cry escapes my lips. Next thing I know we're both on the ground crying on each other's shoulders. His grip on me is like iron and I'm pretty sure nothing could rip me away from him in this moment.

"Oh my God, oh my God." He pants over and over through his tears.

I push away for a moment and look into his read eyes. "I'm sorry." I say hoarsely. "Daddy, I'm so sorry. I couldn't do it any more, I had to leave."

Dad closes his eyes and once again pulls me to him and lays my head against his chest as he rocks me back and forth. "Thank God you're ok." He cries while stroking my hair. "I thought I'd never see you again."

"I'm sorry." I sob over and over against his chest. "I didn't want to leave. Really I didn't but I couldn't take it anymore. I had to get out of there. I'm sorry, I should've told you but I was afraid."

I feel him kiss my temple numerous times as he rests his chin on my head. "Shhh, it's ok, baby. It's over." he whispers into my ear.

I can't stop my tears. They seem to flow like a water faucet as all the memories come washing over me. This isn't the first time I've been in this position. I think the last time it was this emotional was after I woke up in the hospital after I tried to commit suicide, which was probably one of the most terrifying moments of my life. However, I now feel whole again. I'm pretty hard and cold when it comes to most things but being a Daddy's girl will always be my soft spot. I'm twenty five years old and still feel safe and relieved when I'm in his arms.

Dad pulls away and takes my face into his hands, gently lifting my chin. I hesitantly look into his red rimmed eyes and he offers a reassuring smile. "I've missed you." he whispers.

I close my eyes and squeeze his hand. "I've missed you too, Daddy and I'm sorry. For everything. I hurt you…and Mom…and Carl. It's just that…I was ashamed…of myself, of what I did and I was just tired of hurting you. So I left to try to fix myself up…" I fumble with my words so I finally stop.

"Annaliese, look at me." he says gently. "I'm not mad at you." I look at him and his eyes are teary again yet sincere. "Scared the shit out of me and I worried about you every day, your mom too. We…" his voice cracks. "We waited for you…every night. Still put your stocking up every year. You were never excluded from this family and you never will be. You understand that?"

My eyes clench shut as his words hit my heart. "Hey," he says trying to get my attention. "Do you understand me?" he asks again in a bit more stern fatherly voice.

I take a deep shaky breath then nod and offer a watery smile. He smiles back at me as he gently wipes my tears away. "I love you." he whispers softly.

Damn it, these tears. They just keep coming. I feel like a five year old. He offers one more smile then kisses my forehead and hugs me again. "I love you too." I barely whisper.

After a few more minutes of staying like that, we pull apart and actually laugh each other. "Look at us, we're a mess." I say.

Dad laughs as he wipes his tears on the back of his hand then pulls out a bandana and wipes the remaining tears from my face then looks at Shane then back at me. "I betcha more than anything he was taking bets on how emotional we'd be." he jokes, earning a laugh from me as I look at Shane, who adds a smirk.

I nod as I push my hair back and take a moment to pull myself together. "We need to talk." I say seriously.

He sighs. "Yeah, we do." he replies with a nod then stands up and offers a hand to me which I take.

We then walk over to the picnic table and eventually start to fill each other in on what's happened in the past three years. I guess it's not as bad as I thought it'd be. It's hard because it brings up painful memories but at the same time it draws the pain out.

But the main weighing on the back of my mind right now is my dream. I want to tell him but I feel like it'd be an inappropriate to bring up now.

However, if I were to be honest with myself, I dread that even more because I know for a fact he won't believe a word I say.


	5. Beating On the Cross

**_Hey everyone! Thank you so much for reading but I would love reviews for feedback :) Also, I'm posting this story on another site where it allows you to see pictures and stuff. it's walkingfanfiction. com and you'll my story under my user name and be able what these characters look like. Makes it a little more fun :) I changed the name on here to match the one on the other site. Thanks for reading!  
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I've never really been the emotional type. Neither has my father. But, there are certain situations that just make you break down. Like the time he slid on the ice and he spun into another lane, hit a car and then fell into a snow bank. I was five when that happened and when we finally stopped, he whipped around to see if I was ok and I just smiled and said "that was fun!" Or the time I was playing outside and he fell off the roof and knocked himself unconscious. And, of course, can't forget about the time I was jumped in high school by the meanest group of girls, beaten and was out of school for two weeks for my injuries. All of these incidents ended in us sobbing out in each other's arms and right here, right now, this moment…it was no exception.

You see, some people think it's weird how close we are and maybe it is but it's just that we've been through so many close calls that made us realize how lucky we are to be here right now. Mom, she's always been in the background. I wish, more than anything that we could be as close but we just never have. I always joked with Dad told him I was ninety percent him and ten percent Mom. He didn't get it at first but over time, he understood. Don't get me wrong, I love my mother dearly and I want nothing more than to see her again and give her a huge hug but I have to straighten out things between Dad and I first and before I even think about going near Carl, I have to warn Dad about the future. Why not wait? Because I have a feeling Dad is not going to take this news very well and I'd rather leave not seeing them. It's going to be hard enough leaving Dad.

Once we sit at the table, we sober up and I tell Dad and Shane everything that I've been through that's happened over the past three years. It sounds pretty boring to me but they listen intently and nod occasionally. They weren't really thrilled when I told them I worked in a bar but I justified it by telling them it does pay the bills and I'm pretty good terms with most of the people there. Most.

"The apartment I live in is pretty much a hole in the wall but I'm hardly there so I don't really care." I finish and let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding.

"Should've seen the place Shane and I got when we were in college." He smiles then looks at Shane who snorts.

"Oh man, that's a memory I'll never forget. Never could figure out if that was a rat or an opossum." He chuckles.

"Ew!" I exclaim dramatically, making them laugh. It felt good to laugh with them. Really good.

"The important thing is that you're safe and sober. I don't care if you live in a literal hole or what kind of job you have. All that I care about if you're safe." Dad says relieved. He reaches over and grabs my hand. "That's all I wanted for you and I know you're gonna past this. You're already half way there."

"So you're not mad at me?" I ask sheepishly.

Dad's eyes soften. "Of course not. I told you, I was worried as hell and I wish you would've said something before you just up and left but I'm not angry." He sighs and then gives a smirk. "Your mother, however, is a different story."

I cringe. "How is she, dare I ask?"

He looks down, as does Shane as he rubs his neck awkwardly. "She blames herself." He says quietly.

"What?"

"She blames herself for what happened to you." he repeats. "She thinks you acted out because of her and what happened to Emmy."

Here comes the drama. "God, no. That wasn't her fault. It was mine, I was the one who was stupid." I try to insist but he sees right through me.

"Anna, don't try to tell me you didn't act out just because you wanted to have fun." He says in that fatherly voice that drives me crazy.

I look away. "I was hurting." I whisper truthfully. "We lost Emmy. School was hell. Everything in my dreams were coming true. I was…hurting and angry and frustrated but mostly…I was just tired." I give my dad a weary look. "I was tired of being tired. I wanted to forget everything that had happened. Eventually it just got the best of me." I sigh sadly. "Maybe you're right. Maybe…maybe I did blame her but I didn't have the right too. And now I feel like shit."

"Hey, look at me." I hesitantly give look at him. "We all make mistakes and say, do things we know we shouldn't have. It happens but look how far you've come. It's not too late to reconcile."

I take a deep shaky breath. Now is as good as time as any. Here goes nothing.

"Dad, Shane…I-I have something to tell you." I say quietly. Originally, I wasn't going to tell Shane because the last time I did that, it didn't end well but I thought, I might as well tell him now because he's going to find out anyway. Y.O. frickin' L.O.

They both look up and wait for me to continue. I look down at my hands. "I had another dream recently." I say without meeting their eyes.

Shane sighs and shakes his head. "Oh boy, here we go again." he mutters.

Dad gives me a look of despair. "Please Anna, not that again."

"Dad, when have I ever been wrong?" I huff. "Please, please hear me out. It's important."

Dad pinches the bridge of his nose but motions with his hand. "Go ahead." He says in a voice that says what crazy story is she going make up now?

I take a deep breath and put all my concentration on Dad. "Dad, I need you to stay with me on this. I know it's going to sound crazy but please listen to me." I practically beg.

"Anna, go ahead." Dad says more sternly again. He grabs my hand and I realize I'm shaking. His eyes soften. "Tell us."

I take a deep, shaky breath then take out my notebook out of my purse. "This is my dream book." I explain, flipping through the pages. "Every single dream that I've had, every detail, I record in here." Dad listens intently as I turn the page to my most recent dream. "I had this one on Christmas Eve this past year. It's probably the most bizarre one that I've had but I've had it several times and the details keep coming, which is how I know it's real."

"Let me get something straight," Shane starts. "These…dreams you have, you're claiming they come true?"

"Every single one." I answer without hesitation. "Regardless of what you believe." Shane shakes his head.

"What is it?" Dad asks trying to break the tension.

"An apocalypse." I answer in a shaky voice.

Dad and Shane exchange confused and slightly worried glances. "Excuse me, a what?" Shane asks again, making he'd heard me right.

"You heard me." I whisper then push the notebook towards them. Dad raises his eyebrows at me and I motion for them to read it.

As they read over my dreams and drawings, different emotions appear across their face. Disbelief, confusion, sadness, fear…it's almost comical. But this isn't a time to laugh. For when they finish, I don't give them a chance to say anything. I explain myself and every single detail to them. I try to remain as calm as possible but with every disapproving look they give me, the more discouraged I get. I hate it because I know what's coming.

They don't believe a word I'm saying.

When I finally finish, they just stare at me, not sure what to say. I can't blame them much though. I sounded crazy to myself. Dad, he just looks so unbelievably sad and confused. I ruined everything, we had five minutes of good conversation and then just like that, it all went to hell.

Shane stares at me with a hurt expression and I know he's thinking the same thing I am. I came all this way after three years to ruin everything all over again. "Anna, please tell me this is a joke."

My eyes begin to water. "It's not. I'm sorry. I know it sounds crazy but you have to believe me. Every single thing in my dreams come true. They have never been wrong."

"Are you listening to yourself? You're talking about an apocalypse. A 'zombie' apocalypse." He emphasizes dramatically.

"Don't you know I know that sounds crazy? It terrifies me! I don't want this to come true but there is no getting around it."

Shane sighs. "Anna, you need help. That stuff you were on…it's messed up your head." He says bluntly.

I shake my head vigorously, slightly angered. "If I'm so wrong about all this, then how do you explain all the other things my dreams were right about, huh? Like Maria!" I nearly yell and immediately regret my words. That was a low blow. Even Dad looked up and gave me a stern look that says I went too far.

Maria was Shane's fiancé and also the first woman he was ever really serious about. The night before their wedding, Maria was murdered in an alley way while on her way to the car. I remember because I was sixteen at the time and we were going to throw a party for them. I had the dream two months before it happened but I dared not say anything because I denied it. Maria and Shane were supposed to meet us but she never came. They had searched everywhere and when I finally spoke up and suggested the place they look, they found her. It was the most heartbreaking thing I'd ever witnessed with Shane. It took Dad months just to get him to open up and even when he, all he could was cry. Eventually, he just stopped talking about her all together. Until now, of course, thanks to me.

My hand flies to my mouth as I watch Shane's face crumble. I go to reach out for his arm but he jerks it away. "Shane, I'm so-"

"Don't." he quickly dismisses me then stands up. "When you get your head cleared, then we'll talk." He turns to Dad and says, "See ya at work, Rick. Good luck."

Dad gives me a look then follows after Shane and tries to talk to him but there's no use. Shane doesn't have very many weak spots but I just hit one and I hit it hard. "She needs help, man!" I hear him say from across the parking lot. "That bullshit she's spouting off, that ain't normal and I'll be damned if I'm going to sit around and listen to it." He snaps.

Dad tries to calm him down. "Shane, take it easy, brother. She didn't mean it like that." he tries to defend me.

Shane shakes his head. "Nah man, I ain't mad. I'm worried sick. You need to do something." His voice cracks as he gets in his truck and slams the door. "And if you won't, I will."

"Shane, stop it, calm down, we can talk about this." Dad tries to reason.

I place my face in my hands, feeling like junk for what I just did. I hear Dad call out to Shane but he ignores him and drives off. "Damn it." I whisper under my breath.

"That was out of line." I hear him say moments later.

I look up and see his slightly angry expression. "Dad,-"

He holds his hands up. "No, Anna. Now that's enough." he says firmly then sighs. "What the hell was that?" I remain silent, not sure what to say. He stands right in front of me and takes me by the arms. "I asked you a question."

"Dad, please. Please just listen to me on this." I beg. "I-I hate what I just said to Shane but I didn't know how else to prove my point! That was in my dream and you know what, it came true! How do you think I knew where to find her, huh?"

Dad puts his hands on his hips and shakes his head. A clear sign that he's very agitated. "I don't know what's gotten into you but this is going too far. All this talk about a damn apocalypse is ridiculous and it's scaring the hell out of me."

"You're scared?" I scoff. "I'm terrified! Do you think I asked for this?"

Dad sighs and tries to reason with me. "Anna, calm down. You've gone through hell, a lot of trauma, that's probably all it is."

I shake my head wildly. "No, no! That's not it! I've been dealing with this my whole life and you always, always push me away when I try to tell you what I see." My voice cracks and my throat begins to tighten. "When have they been wrong, Dad? Every nightmare, every warning, they've all come true and there's nothing you or anybody can do to prevent it and you know that!" I feel myself slipping as I know this argument is going nowhere.

Dad sighs. "What do you want me to do? Go broadcast it everywhere? Because even I did, who do you think would be crazy enough to listen?" he asks exasperated.

"I want you to believe me, Dad, that's what I want! I know people aren't going to believe me, I hardly believe it myself but I know my dreams and they have never, ever been wrong. I didn't ask for this! I didn't want them to be right about Maria or Emmy or even me." He gives me a bewildered look. "That's right. All the hell I went through, I saw it coming and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't change it. So yeah, maybe my head is fucked up because of the shit I did but that has nothing to do with my dreams. If I had it my way, I wouldn't tell a soul but it's happened too many times, it's scaring me and I'm only telling you because I tell you everything and I need you. I need you to believe me."

Dad's eyes water as he rubs his neck and tries to think of the right thing to say. Finally he sighs and refuses to look me in the eye. "Anna, there's something wrong. This isn't normal." He closes his eyes then looks down. "I knew you struggled with this for several years and you're right, I didn't do anything. Now it's gotten worse."

"Daddy…" I whisper sadly.

I see a tear run down his cheek. "Until you get help, I can't allow you to see your mother or Carl." He whispers brokenheartedly.

My eyes snap open. "What? Dad, no-"

"I can't allow them to see you like this. Your mom…she can't take it and Carl, he won't understand and I don't want to hurt him." He explains.

"Daddy, please. Don't…don't this. I don't…I don't want to do this on my own." I beg.

His eyes grow even sadder as he comes closer and puts his hands on my shoulders. "Listen to me, Annaliese. It doesn't have to be this way. I don't want to do that. It'd kill me just as much as it would you. Please don't force me to do it."

My heart constricts and the realization hits me full force. I saw it coming like everything else but it still hurts like hell and I make sure he knows that. "You know the sad part about this is?" I whisper sadly. "I saw this coming too. It's even written in the notebook and that kills me because after this, I'm going to lose you and I'm not…I'm not ready for that." and there I go. I'm gone. I walk away quickly to the picnic table and begin sobbing really hard.

I feel a pair of arms wrap around me and I find myself crying into his chest. I hug him with all my strength as the pain hits me over and over again. I'm not ready for this and I never will be. "Shhh," he hushes gently. "It's going to be ok, baby. We're gonna get through this." He tries to reassure me but I can hear the worry in his voice.

I want so badly to believe it'll be alright but I know it won't. This is it.

Eventually all my tears are cried out and I finally let go. "I'm sorry." I whisper. "I'd rather be crazy but I know that I'm not. I'm sorry for letting you down."

His face kills me. Sorrow, fear, concern and complete heartbreak cover his face. I can't take it any more. I have to get out of there. "I'm sorry." I choke out as I kiss his cheek. "I love you. So much." I cry then quickly start walking towards my car.

"Anna…Anna!" Dad calls after me as he snaps out of his shock. Tears blur my vision as I continue walking. As I sit down in my car, I see him beside me. "Annaliese, don't leave." Tears prick his eyes. "I just got you back." He pleads.

Man this hurts. I crank up my car then look at him. "If by any miracle you change your mind, call Shane. He has my number." I mumble before shifting into reverse.

He grabs my hand and gives me one more pleading look. "You don't have to do this. We can figure this out." He tries to persuade me.

I sigh and close my eyes. Was I really doing the right thing? "Daddy, you always taught me to do the right thing even if it's the hardest to do and doesn't always seem like it's the most rational." I look up. "That's what I'm doing now. It doesn't much sense right now but it will soon." I grab his hand and squeeze. "I love you, so much. I can't tell you that enough. I wish that I could've made you more proud. Maybe in the long run I can."

"Anna," he says, voice full of emotion.

I offer a pained smile. "At least this time I got to say goodbye." Before I pull away, I bid him one more farewell. "Goodbye, Daddy."

And with that, I drive off. The faint sounds of him calling my name in the background. It's something I'll remember for the rest of my life.

As I drive farther and farther away, I allow myself to break down and cry hysterically. Never in my life have I had to do something that was so hard and heartbreaking. Even when I left all those years ago, it didn't hurt like this. I kept screaming why over and over again and whenever I stopped, people would look and give me a concerned look. On and on I drove, my heart scattering into more pieces with each mile. I didn't understand why this had to happen to me. Why me, of all people, did I have to be cursed with this…whatever you call it? It sure as hell isn't a gift.

As I was about thirty minutes away from home, I pull over because I was still crying and the tight chest and hiccups were getting the best of me. I throw myself back into the seat and try to calm myself down but I can't seem to stop. About fifteen minutes later, I look out the window to see that I'm parked next to a church. Without much thinking, I get out and try the doors. Surprisingly it's open and I let myself in. I go into the fairly small sanctuary and see a cross at the front, a scripture engraved on it.

_"For God so loved the world…"_

A sudden surge of anger rushes through me. "Bullshit!" I scream as I knock everything off a table. "You don't give a shit!" I yell at the cross and I stomp my way over to it. "If you cared so much then why would you do this?! Why?! I used to believe in You but you've proven time after time that You don't give a shit about me! Why? What did I do to make You hate me so much?! Why of all people did You have to give me this curse? I don't want it! I do what these stupid dreams tell me to do and it's done nothing but tear my family apart. The fucking world is ending yet You can't allow me to have time with my family?!" I slam my fist against the cross. "You're killing me!" I fall to my knees, all the fight gone from me. I sob hysterically, surprised that I haven't already dehydrated myself. "Please, by some miracle let me be crazy. I'm begging You, if You're there, please take this away from me. I can't do it…I can't do it anymore."

I'm blubbering and contradicting the hell out of myself but I can't bring myself to stop. I don't even know if who I'm trying to talk is even there but this is my last desperate act. I've reached my breaking point. I literally can't do this anymore.

I nearly jump out of my skin when I feel on my shoulder. I whip around so fast that I nearly fall over. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." A man with green eyes, brown hair and a beard says in a gentle voice.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought no one else was here." I explain nervously.

"No, no, it's all good. I was in the back locking up when I heard the screaming. I just wanted to make sure everything was ok." He says kindly then holds out his hand. "I'm Pastor Ben."

My cheeks go hot as I shake his hand. "Anna." I introduce myself timidly. My face goes pale as I realize I wrecked the table. I quickly get up and start cleaning up the mess. "I'm really, really sorry about this." I apologize embarrassed as I can be.

He bends down and picks up the two communion plates. "It's quite alright. We all have our break down moments." He says with a soft smile.

My blush deepens as I fix everything up the way I had it. "How much did you hear?"

"Everything from 'bullshit' to 'I can't do it.'" he chuckles.

I close my eyes and rub my forehead. "So everything." I conclude. "What a great impression."

To my surprise he laughs. "Nothing to be embarrassed of. What kind of relationship would we have with God if we never brought Him our pain and our questions?"

"I think I completely disrespected Him. Then I have the nerve to come and beg for help." I say ashamed.

"You're not the first person, Anna. What kind of friendship would you have if you always pretended to be happy and like everything was grand all the time? It's not a very good one." he says.

"No offense, Pastor but God and I haven't exactly been friends in a long time." I say while looking down.

"Well, obviously you didn't come here to give thanks." He inquires sarcastically. I look up to see him and I can't help but give my own. "Pain isn't something to be ashamed of, Anna. You coming in here and showing how you really feel is very rare but not looked down upon. We all go through situations in life that don't seem fare and sometimes it feels like we're literally going through hell." He pauses then takes a step forward. "I'm not here to preach to you, it's not necessary. But, I will say that I admire your honesty. You know, often during times of pain people try to push it down and still thank God which isn't a bad thing but then there's a time to be honest. It's like 'God is good but is He really good all the time? ' as they say? What do you do when prayer doesn't work, talking about it doesn't work, being thankful and praising doesn't work?" he looks me in the eye. "Sometimes all that's left is being brutally honest and saying…or yelling that you're angry, you're scared and you don't understand a thing He's doing."

I stand there in slight shock. Never in a million years would I expect someone to tell me this was ok, much more get what I'm going through. "Sounds like you really get it." I say softly.

Pastor Ben offers a weak smile. "You're not the first one to bang their fists on that cross." He replies meaningfully then pats me on the shoulder. "You take as much time as you need, Anna. If you need me, I'll be upstairs." He says kindly then starts to walk away.

I don't know what it is today, maybe it's desperation of trying to figure myself out and actually being able to relate to everything this man has said. But I find myself calling out to him. "Pastor Ben!" I call out, getting his attention. As he turns around, I walk up to him and ask in desperation, "Can we talk?"

His face softens and he offers a knowing smile. "Of course."

So we sit down in a pew and for the next hour, I tell him everything. Not wasting a single detail.


	6. I Ain't a Hero

It's funny how much you can tell a person in an hour and still feel like you haven't gotten anywhere. While the pastor was very nice and seemed to understand my emotional pain, there was still no way he'd ever understand my dreams. Pretty much, in a very kind way, he agreed with my father. He didn't believe me, of course he didn't. No one ever would. It's too crazy of a thing to believe in. The difference was he wasn't rude about it, not like Shane had been. I don't blame him though. I hardly believe myself.

"I feel so lost and empty. Like…no matter how hard I try, I can't get ahead." I admit as he listens intently. "I just don't understand it. All my other dreams that came true at least made sense. This one just scares me. It's a weird feeling. It's like I'm here but I'm not in total touch with reality."

Pastor Ben nods. "You know, it may not be as bad as you think. It could just be a reoccurring nightmare. I mean, I understand your others always came true but it doesn't mean this one will." He clears his throat. "This is probably the last thing you want to hear but horrific nightmares are normal after the trauma and substance abuse you went through."

"Do me a favor and say what you really want to say, Pastor." I say a bit irritated. "Don't sugar coat it and say I suffered from 'trauma and substance abuse'. I was a total rebellious brat in high school and got into more trouble than I can count. Then I was beat on my scumbag boyfriend who me dragged into drugs and alcohol. That's what it is. And you're telling me these nightmares are the cause of that?" I scoff. "In a very polite way you're calling me crazy."

He chuckles. "There's a difference being 'crazy' and just going through an after effect. I know because I've been there."

"Oh yeah?" I raise my eyebrows.

He nods. "Seven years in a crack house. Seven. That's quite a few years I have on you." he winks. "When I finally did decide to clean myself up, I went through a lot of emotional problems for quite a few years. Weird nightmares that didn't make sense included." The middle aged man sighs, remembering his past. "I won't lie to you and say I believe your dream will come true. I would have to see it to believe it which hopefully doesn't happen. But I don't think you're crazy. I can understand why you'd think it could come true because of the others but when is the last time one came true?"

"Shortly after I moved." I shrug.

"So about two, three years and you're telling me this dream is no way a result of the things you went through?" he questions.

I think for a moment. I guess he could be right…maybe. I have had other dreams besides this one that didn't make sense at all. I don't know. I don't know anything for sure right now. "I don't know, Pastor. Either way I feel like I screwed things up. I always do. It's like my specialty."

"Everybody comes to their breaking point sooner or later, Anna. It's not something you can avoid. Sooner or later, you're past is going to catch up and you're going to have to deal with it. You can't keep running like this." He says in a gentle yet firm voice.

My eyes water. "It was never my intention to run away. I just…these dreams scare me so much because they're always true and there's nothing ever good that comes out of them. Ever. I know I sound crazy and I really hope they're wrong but even if they aren't exactly like what happened, then something bad is still going to happen." I say softly.

Pastor Ben looks at me with sympathetic eyes then puts a hand on my shoulder. "Then make things right while you still can, Anna. If this is a strong urge that you're feeling, then don't waste any more time and don't look like at it as curse. Heed it's warning and if anything, try to prevent it if you can." He sighs. "When we go through things like this, it's hard not to blame God. I do it myself from time to time. But if there is one thing that I've learned, pain never goes without reason and God is very good at taking our pain, our past and turning it into something good, something useful in the end."

"What good could come out of this?" I whisper sadly. "He'd have to be one hell of a crafty man."

He chuckles softly. "You'd be surprised. He takes first place." I can't help but smile at the kind man's words as he gives my shoulders a gentle squeeze. "You're going to be able to help a lot of people that are going to need you. It'll be hard some days but you'll get through them. Don't look at this warning as a bad thing. Look at it as preparation for what's to come. People are going to need you and you'll be able to pull them through. Sounds like a heavy burden but you won't carry it alone. And you're on the right path now. It takes a lot of courage to open up to a stranger like you have."

I offer a small smile. "You're easy to talk to and I hope you're right." I sigh tiredly. "I just want to get through this. I'm so tired, Pastor. So tired."

"Hey, look at me." he says sternly. "You're struck down but not destroyed, understand? You're a fighter, even I can see that and I know that you're going to get through this. You're not alone. You'll find the right path and be able to make the right choices even when they're not the easiest. But Anna, hear me out. You have got to hold on. You've got to wait this out. Figure out what you're going to do to mend you're family. They love you and they want to help you but you've got to let them. Folks like yours, they don't give up easily on the ones they love. Remember that."

I smile weakly. "Can't really forget it." I whisper as I look back on memories. "One time I got into an accident when I was a teenager. I snuck out of the house to a party I wasn't allowed to go to but of course, I didn't listen. We were stupid…we drove home plastered and that was the last time I saw my best friends." I pause and wipe a stray hair from my face. "That was one event I didn't see coming. It just…came out of nowhere. And I expected Dad to be furious with me but all he did when he saw me was cry. Just…grabbed my hand and cried." I look to the pastor's face, whose eyes are mirroring my own pain. "That's the most I've seen from him these past few years…tears. Endless tears and disappointment yet…all I ever saw in his eyes was relief."

Pastor Ben nods. "You're here for a reason. From everything that you've told me, it's a miracle you're still here. And you're still young. You're not too far gone. You have a family that loves you and wants you to get better. You have to hold on to that."

"I know." I say quietly.

He smiles gently. "Every second we have is a chance to start over. You can't change the past but you can heal, learn from it. Forgive the people who did you wrong and forgive yourself."

I can't help but smirk. "You gonna preach on forgiveness, Pastor?"

He chuckles. "Nah, I'm sure you've heard all about it already. And I told ya before, I ain't here to preach to ya. But I will say this and I'm allowed to say it because I learned the hard way. Unforgiveness is like drinking the poison and expecting the other person to die. And unforgiveness towards yourself is like taking a whip to your back every single day and eventually, there's only so much you can take before you just…give out." He whispers knowingly then gives me a sympathetic look. "And it looks like you're just about give out."

The statement caught me off guard but it made sense and I knew he was right. "Yeah. I am." I answer honestly.

I feel a gentle hand on my shoulder, causing me to look up. "It's time to put that whip down, Anna."

Damn tears. I thought they were done but that did it. I crack and more of the poison that's been coursing through my veins for so long begins to flush out. The tears are no longer angry or sad ones but it's more of a releasing kind. I sob quietly to myself and Pastor Ben occasionally rubs my back. It's comforting and comfort is something I haven't felt in a long time.

Finally, I wipe my tears away and look at the man sitting beside me, who offers a small smile. "Thank you." I mumble.

"You're welcome." He replies then sits up straight. "You're gonna alright. You're a strong woman and a fighter. Just remember you're not fighting alone and for what it's worth, we're gonna be praying for you." he says kindly.

"Well, for what it's worth, I'm gonna need it." I smile weakly with a chuckle. "I don't really know the big man that well but do you think he'd give me a hand here and there?"

"I'll put in a good word for ya." He winks.

I grin then take a deep breath and rest my face in my hands. "So what now?" I ask curiously.

"Now, you move forward." He says simply.

It's such a simple answer that it doesn't even sound hard to do in real life but I know that it's going to be a lot easier said than done. But I know I shouldn't take any more of this guy's time. He's already done enough, more than I could ask for. And though I'm still a bit confused, I do feel better than when I came in here. I came to a simple conclusion that I really had to think about this dream before I acted on it. Try to interpret it better, see if it even means anything at all.

We talk for a few minutes until he announces that it's time for him to go. I thank him for his time and he tells me I'm welcome back any time, even though it still is a ways from home. He then walks me to my car then watches from the stairs as I take one more look at the church. Pastor Ben smiles then gives one final wave goodbye. I wave then pull away from the curb and soon, I'm left once again with just my thoughts and reflections. Now what do I do?

I really should heed his advice and think about what I'm going to do. Right now I'm cursing myself for being so stupid over this whole dream thing. I could just have had a string of nightmares, it's not completely out of the question. I've had them before and I don't just not dream in between my visions. So I concluded I'm not right but I'm not crazy. I'm just...paranoid.

I spend the rest of my time in the car thinking. Thinking about life, my friends, family. Those I've lost, those I've gained and those I've been given a second chance with. I think about the conversation Pastor Ben and I had. How I need to stop running from my problems and just face them. And Daryl, as much as I didn't want to, I had to apologize for being a hypocrite and trying to be his savior. It still irked me to know that he's treated the way he is but I have no control over that. I'm a lot of things but a hero ain't one of them and that's something that I have to get through my thick head.

When I finally get home it's late and all my strength is gone. I throw the keys on the table and drag myself upstairs. It's been a long day filled with so many emotions and I'm ready to just put them to rest for a few hours. I flop down on my bed and within a few minutes I'm fast asleep.

I feel like I'm trapped in a never ending nightmare. It's weird because even in my dreams I know I'm dreaming but there's nothing I can do about it. I want out but I can't get out. I'm trapped in a world where horrific things happen in front of my eyes and I can't do a thing about it. I kinda feel like Scrooge, watching all these terrible things happening in front of my eyes but no matter how much I cry out, it doesn't stop.

I see my parents fighting nonstop, my little brother peeking out from around the corner and listening in fear to the arguments. Mom threatening a divorce. Then I see Shane arguing with my dad about none other than myself, how I'm sick and that I need to do more than see a shrink. And then on to more terrifying things that I hope to God for my sanity don't come true. It's like a tragic movie playing before my eyes. A police chase gone wrong. Thinking the bad guys were taken down but not all. A plea to one policeman's partner to not tell his wife. Then BANG! Gunshot wound to the side. Rushed to the hospital, doctors tell his friends and family he's in a coma. Time and more time passes by while people come and go, get well soon balloons deflate, and flowers wilt and eventually the clock just stop ticking. All the while I'm screaming from a distance while the man sleeps and death is literally knocking at his door.

I wake up with a jolt as well as a very raw throat and my heart beating ninety to nothing. I start shaking but I try to breathe and calm myself down, telling myself that it was only a nightmare. It wasn't real. It's just a side effect from stress among all other things.

The next two nights are the same. I go through the motions, go to sleep, get trapped with repeated nightmares and wake up exhausted. On the third day, I wake up and notice that the sun is high in the sky.

When I finally look at the clock, I notice that it's nearly noon. Damn, that's a long time to be trapped in nightmare world, I thought to myself. It's eerily quiet in my house though. That quiet that takes place before a bad storm. I begin to get real nervous but quickly right it off as anxiety and make myself get up to fix some coffee.

The ring of the phone makes me jump about three feet out of skin. I quickly walk over to my phone and answer. "Hello?" I answer skeptically. Hardly anybody ever calls me.

I hear someone sniffle on the other line. "Anna? It's Shane." I hear a broken voice on the other line.

"Shane? What's wrong?" I ask worried.

I hear a few sobs on the other end. Something isn't right. Shane hardly ever cries. I've seen him cry maybe twice in my life. "Annaliese, listen to me, baby. I need you to stay calm, alright?"

My heart beats faster. "Shane, st-stop it, you're scaring me. What's going on?" my voice trembles.

I hear him sigh loudly. "There's…there's been an accident with your daddy." My whole body goes pale. No. "Had his back turned on a guy he thought was dead. He turned on him, whipped out his gun and shot him before I had a chance to react."

I start breathing heavily as my recent dream flashes before my eyes. "No. No, no, no." I whisper frantically.

"Anna, listen to me. He's…he's not dead. He's in a coma and he's stable…" I drop the phone and crumble to my knees. The weight of freight train hitting me full force. I gasp at the pain.

"Ah!" I cry out as I clench my side as the pain worsens. It physically hurts like hell. I start to cry hysterically as I back myself into a corner. "Anna? Anna!" Shane calls out to me but I'm shaking too bad to pick up the phone.

I hear Shane crying over the phone too and it makes my heart constrict even more. Eventually, he sobers up enough to try to talk to me again. "It's gonna be alright. Doc says he's stable and they're doing all they can."

"Mom…Carl?" I ask.

"They're with him now. They're in the same shape as the rest of us but Carl is trying to be strong for your mom." He replies.

"I shouldn't have said all those terrible things. I was wrong, Shane, I was wrong. Now he's going to die and I didn't even get to say goodbye." I cry as another wave of pain hits me.

"Hey, hey you listen here." He says sternly. "None of this was your fault. None of it. Don't even go there. Your father is one of the strongest and most stubborn men I ever met. If there's anybody who can pull through this, it's him. You gotta believe in him."

It hurts to talk, to breathe, even to think and I can't even imagine trying to argue with Shane right now. I feel I've been hit repeatedly in the gut only ten times worse. "Will…will you tell him to hang on until I get there? Please?"

"Of course." Shane says softly.

"I gotta go." I say suddenly as I choke terribly on another sob. "I'll try to get there soon. Please keep me updated."

"Alright," he sighs. "You hang in there, ya hear me, Anna? He's in good hands, he'll pull through."

"I hope so." I whisper sadly then quickly hang up.

I angrily throw the phone and hit the wall. "No!" I scream, choking on my tears.

I don't cry, I wail. Loudly. Loud enough for neighbors to hear. Not that a lot of them would give a shit. Hours and hours of sobbing and wailing go by as the pain hits me relentlessly. When I finally start to calm down, I know technically I should be heading to the hospital but instead, I numbly dress in the skimpiest outfit, put on a ton of makeup and march myself down to my work. Only this time I'm not on the clock.

I'm having myself a damn drink.


End file.
